I’ve talked about starting a blog for a long time now because I truly enjoy writing, reading (although I don’t have as much time for it as I’d like) and editing. I have even found that I spend less and less time on Facebook these days. After reading pages of posts containing misspellings, bad grammar and poor punctuation, I close it feeling as though the collective number of combined brain cells left circling the globe is diminishing at a rapid pace. What’s more shocking is that no one seems bothered by their own display of ignorance that is helping to mold my opinion. Reel it in people! I’m the prick that wants to correct your spelling in the comments of your post. Although, I’m not claiming perfection, but at least I TRY! Anyway… I digress.
So after a lot of thought and guidance from my best friend as to how to get this off the ground, here I am. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted to blog about and I’m not certain I’ve narrowed it down just yet. Too many angles perhaps. Single mom? Check. Animal lover? Check. Relationship? Check. Relocated to a Caribbean island with 4 dogs, 4 cats and a teenage daughter. CHECK. Well there we go ladies and gentlemen… the endless supply of my discussions. Here I am in Roatan, Honduras. Bugs, heat, power outages, with the ups and downs of cohabitation with a man all the while holding down a full time job….on the flipside I have nature, beautiful sunsets, turquoise water, no commute and some really great people.
It’s been almost a year and I’m still adjusting. We all are I think. Fortunately, I moved here for a man so I had a bit of a soft landing compared to the several expats that sold everything and made the leap. Man, those people have balls (pardon the expression). But seriously, third world living is not for everyone. And living on an island isn’t always as glamorous as it sounds. Things I have learned:
1) “Island Time” does exist. No one is in a hurry…except the cab drivers. Just because you pay for a service, doesn’t mean you’re getting it anytime soon.
2) Trust is in short supply amongst the natives. That’s hard to wrap your head around when you’re a generally trusting soul and can’t understand why anyone would want to screw you over.
3) It’s possible to sweat 24 hours a day. Even when you’re not moving. From every area of your body. Nothing is immune. But hey, my skin looks great as I’m forever “glowing”. Did you know you can sweat in the shower?
4) Sandflies are miniscule devil spawns with wings, that exist to only make you miserable and appear as though you have a skin disease. I don’t care if deet kills… I’ll take my chances thanks. We’re all going to die and I don’t want to appear as though my death was the result of a flesh eating disease.
5) Who needs speed bumps when you have potholes? Roatan excels at growing and cultivating them at a rapid pace. Their patch jobs include just enough asphalt to hold the dust down and is only completed once a year. Well done guys! However, their shoddy work does result in jobs for several other people that stand on the side of the road with a bucket and a shovel, slowly filling up one hole at a time for tips. It’s Roatan’s equivalent to a toll road. When they’re at the top of their game, you can drive fast enough to keep from getting passed by a moped.
6) Speaking of mopeds. Who knew they doubled as a family sedan? Well equipped to carry a family of 5. If you bring your own baseball batting helmet, they’ll find a place to put you! I truly never knew they were so versatile.
This list could actually go on and on, but I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining as I’m sitting out on one of our balconies staring out at the sea as the sun goes down. Tough life, right? I’m very grateful that I’m here. All of the quirks and adjustments are laughable when kept in perspective. Although, keeping that perspective is sometimes a challenge.
I often wonder, despite my circumstances, how similar my life is to others. Do other people see things the way I do? Do they have the same struggles? At any moment during the day do you expect the candid camera crew to pop out and surprise you? Or do you ever pause in anticipation of hearing “You’ve just been punked!”? Maybe that’s what prompted me to start a blog. Inquiring minds want to know. In addition, I feel I have a lot to share and hope to make a few people laugh along the way!